Her breathing slows and we’ve been silently staring each other down for minutes. Breaking the silence she says, ‘You finally got me in your bed. This is where I wanted to be in the first place.’ ‘Yeah bullshit, you never wanted to be here.’ ‘It’s just one more of those loathsome tasks grown-ups have to do.’ she scrutinizes me, intensely watching for reactions. ‘It’s not about me at all, it’s how you got here.’ ‘You’re right, you’re a small man playing a small part.’ I consciously don’t react to her jibes. I don’t want to arm her. ‘What do you think about a man who asks his future wife to fuck a stranger to assuage his guilt?’ ‘Don’t bring him into it. He’s ten times the man you’ll ever be. He’s an important man with a future. He’s responsible for hundreds of people. They look up to him and depend on him, while you hide alone in your house. Nobody depends on you.’ She reveals a problem with the loner trick. Clever opponents find new and excruciating ways to recycle the same. They finished the vodka and asked if there was more to drink and my Dad said there was some more in the cabinet. They started drinking some more and they were starting to get pretty drunk. They had taken off most of their clothes because the camp was so hot from the fireplace. They sat down in some chairs across from the couch where my Dad and I were sitting. "So what have we got here? Dad and his boy out for some fun in the woods?", the older guy asked. They looked to be about in their late 30's. My Dad was in his 40's and I was 25. My Dad said, "My son and I don't want any trouble we were just gonna do some hunting this weekend. Leave us alone and we won't tell anybody anything." "Well, that's damn nice of you buddy but I think we will do just about anything we want with you cuz we have the guns, remember? I think your boy is a pretty good lookin k** Dad", the older guy said as he looked at me with drunken eyes. I had no idea what he was thinkin but I was gonna find out real soon..
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